Rejuvenated....And Exhausted

Something that darling spouse and I continue to work on is bettering our communication. For example, when he suggests going to Starbucks for bagels and I say, "They don't have bagels at Starbucks," I really mean "They-may-have-bagels-at-Starbucks-but-not-the-kind-I-like-so-I-don't-want-to-go-there." I, meanwhile, am learning that when he insists that he doesn't care where we go for dinner, he really means he doesn't care. Men are so much more straightforward than women...some days.

We've been together for almost 5 years, married for 6 months. It's funny that when we got married I naively thought that, since we'd practically been living together for the last year (okay, well, across the street as opposed to 100 miles apart), that "things wouldn't really change." HA! Yeah. Fool. Being MARRIED to your significant other is much different than DATING your significant other.

For those of you who've stuck with this entry so far, congratulations. My mind is rambling tonight.

Continuing....

I've been told that the first year of marriage is one of the most challenging. We've had the money argument, but that hasn't been our biggest challenge. Our biggest challenge has been learning to better communicate. For Kevin, yes means yes and no means no, and I'm learning to trust what he says. For me, however, this is not always the case. There's many layers to my responses. At the same time, we've learned how to read the nonverbals. How to say, "leave me alone" without actually speaking. Learning to respect each other's space. Learning when it's best to stick around and when breathing room is what is needed.

I still have a point.

Something else I've learned is how much more you share in your spouse's pains and worries. In the last couple months, we've faced a couple personal challenges. These are things we have to conquer both individually and together. It's difficult, seeing your partner struggle with personal demons. Kevin, will, I'm sure, tell you the same thing. Finally, in the last couple days, all things have come together. We're left feeling triumphant in the face of our challenge. I'm enjoying seeing a load of stress lifted off of the man I've married, whose burdens I've helped shoulder recently. This break has been rejuvenating, both personally and emotionally.

Which brings me to exhaustion. This morning the alarm went off at 5:00am. 16 "eager" young faces awaited my instruction. Reality came crashing back down. But I feel ready to take it on again.

As soon as I sleep.